A delayed account.

DW and I attended the last home came of the Toronto Argonauts on Thursday. Unfortunately, the timing was bad so no one was able to join us at the event; and what an event it was. We have been to games in the past but it has been a long time since it was electric in the stadium. We were 40,000+ strong and it was the Hamilton Ticats. For my US friends, think Buffalo hosting the Miami Dolphins; this is our version of "Squish the Fish" (I would would have said "Stomp The Tabby" but... you know).

Anyhow, we got our tickets from this Dominion promotion. It was probably the first and last time we do that. Yes, they were only twenty bucks for the pair. Yes, we got two free t-shirts with them. Yes, we "could" get decent seats in the 100 level with them. Now, here is the rub that must be understood. No where did we notice the fine print that said seating was "limited" and on a first come first served basis for the 100 level. Once the Dominion "fan" section was filled, they shuttled your ass into the nose-bleed section. This was truly a matter of you get what you paid for. We will pay higher to get more next time.

So, disgruntled and disappointed, we went off to the gate they said we had to go through which was Gate 2; we were at Gate 7 picking up our tickets. I've been having bad leg cramps and knee issues (old soccer injury and overweight issues combined) so hauling fat ass up several flights of stairs was not fun. We got ushered into that gate and then had to climb Skydome's (&^%$*^% Ted and his name change) ramps to the 500 level. The ramps are the best for egress; not so fun for ingress, but it beats stairs. Once we reached the level, we got told which direction to go for the seats. Well, we got told which direction to go as there was very little help from the disinterested and useless staff at Ted's Palace (now known as the Rogers Centre). Since the place was packed, it was a long steady climb to an open row of seats (as you know, I hate people). We were high enough that the support rafters were blocking part of the Sony Jumbotron.

So, let me conclude my bitching before some positive games notes. In the next row above us us, we had the unfortunate pleasure of three blonde twits sitting there. One of them insisted on not only dangling her feet down to sit upon the chair below, but to also constantly bang at it through the first half of the game. I did not initially say anything, but it was starting to grate on me. Just before I asked the twitiest of the trio to stop, they picked up and moved to seating that was lower. No stereotyping but they really seemed more interested in picking up some new sausage to gnaw on rather than to watch an excellent football game.

Next on the twit list was the group that decided to sit no where else but on the row below us; this was two guys and three girls. And yet again, a blonde twit amongst them; though at least one of the other two was no brunette space cadet. At least one of them had a demeanor and clue that said to the public "I have parents that care". Now I know the fashion statement of the day is the low-rider jeans but my gawd, can someone put out a rule on wearing it please? The blonde had no ass and more side fat out of the jeans than in. Top that off with either no underwear or one so tiny that when we moved, all you got was plumber's crack displayed. While the body passed the "would not send her home right away" test, the Streisand shnoz was a definite turnoff. Oh yeah, she also had the disgusting, rude and unsafe habit of smoking in the stands.

It started bothering DW and I enough that I finally had to lean forward and kindly ask her to put it out please as the smoke was coming right up into our faces. To her credit (or was that fear?), she put it out immediately and I thanked her. Of course, she just had to have one so she went off to a higher part of the section to smoke right on the stairs! Staff food idiot even saw this and he did and said nothing. Let me tell you, there would have been an ejection at The Air Canada Centre. On top of that, he never even offered a drink to our area; hell we never saw any concession people the entire night. If we have to sit up in the clouds, the least they can do is feed us or get us drunk. The whole experience there was a huge disappointment. Thankfully, the game was a hugely enjoyable experience.

Our beloved Argonauts beat the snot out of the Ticats. Damon Allen was so dominate that he was rested the entire fourth quarter. He racked up 5000 passing yards for the first time in his 21 year career in the CFL. We had three guys in the 1000 yard rushing club. We had rookies playing like veterans, guys who had to step in for injured first lines that did their job and a defence that would make an NFL coach shed a tear. I'd have to say that the only sore spots about the game was the wussy announcing (especially during the halftime show) and the anemic dancing of the Argo cheerleaders. What the hell happened to this group? It used to be a huge drool factor but now, unless the costume has promise of possible boob sightings, it is just sad to watch. This group seriously needs to catch some Toronto Raptors games to understand what cheerleading is all about.

As for the halftime show, this guy got to kick a 50-yard field goal for a million bucks, courtesy of Wendy's Canada. Since this was just your average schmo, most of the stadium stayed during the halftime to see him attempt the kick. Kicks really, as he got a chance to win other prizes from the 20, 30 and 40 yard lines. So, after listening to the annoying banter, when we could hear it because the sound kept cutting out, things got rolling. It was painful to watch initially as he shanked it right of the post (two refs were under the uprights to officially call the attempts) at the 20, 30, and 40 yard lines. He had the distance every single time, but went wide right. Hmmm, where have we seen that before? Something tells me it was that asshole who (*&^%(*&^ up my Super Bowl celebration on Buffalo's first attempt to win a championship; Washington won that game and we lost three more straight, but I digress. He lined it up on the fifty and... they go to a commercial timeout?!?!?!

I would have kicked the announcer in his nuts. That is simply cruel and unusual punishment. Anyhow, back from the break, he lines up like Prefontaine taught him and kicked it. It looked more wobbly than the other three, it may not make the distance, it was starting to bend left... did he overcompensate? NO! It's up, it's straight enough and it was good!!! The whole place went nuts, drowning out even the fireworks that went off. The whole team came on field to celebrate with him (and to ask for a loan as he was now the highest paid player on the field). Of course, all good things come with a caveat; his comes with two. He has a girlfriend, who apparently has been hinting (pressuring?) at a ring. When asked about this, I had to laugh and give the guy props for his answer of "we'll see what happens". The biggest rub though was that the million would be paid out in 25K installments over the next forty years. Are you kidding me Wendy's? That is just sad and pretty pathetic. It should be at least 50K a year so that it actually works as a supplemental or replacement income. In this current climate, no one has a guarantee of forty more years. Pretty ass-out play there Wendy's really high on the suckameter.

Well, the team is off to Ottawa for the final game of the season. Damon Allen will play in order to stay sharp for the November 20th tilt here in Toronto against either Montreal or Saskatchewan. We intend to be there and hope to get a group of people together to go and have a raucous good time. If you can make it, see you there!

Ciao.