Wednesday's Funnies

Submitted by LB
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Dr Dave

Doctor Dave had slept with one of his patients and felt guilty all day long. No matter how much he tried to forget about it, he couldn't. The guilt and sense of betrayal were overwhelming.

But every now and then he'd hear an internal reassuring voice in his head that said: "Dave, don't worry about it. You aren't the first medical practitioner to sleep with one of their patients and you won't be the last.... And you're single. Just let it go."

But invariably another voice in his head would bring him back to reality.


Whispering..



Dave......





Dave........





Dave........





Dave........













.................you're a vet!


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Submitted by PS
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Barry feared his wife wasn't hearing as well as she used to and he thought she might need a hearing aid. Not quite sure how to approach her on such a delicate subject he called the family Doctor to discuss the problem. The Doctor told him there is a simple informal test the husband could perform to give the Doctor a better idea about her hearing loss. "Here's what you do," said the Doctor. "Stand about 50 feet away from her, and in a normal conversational speaking tone see if she hears you. If not go to 40 feet, then 30 feet, and so on until you get a response."

That evening , the wife is in the kitchen cooking dinner and he was in the den. He says to himself, "I'm about 50 feet away, let's see what happens"

Then in a normal tone he asks, "Honey, what's for dinner ?"

No response.

So Barry moves closer to the kitchen about 40 feet from Joan and repeats "Honey, what's for dinner?"

Still no response.

So he walks up closer to his wife and repeats "Honey, what's for dinner?"

Again there is no response.

So, he walks up to the kitchen door, about 10 feet away. "Honey what's for dinner?"

Again there's no response.


So he walks right up behind her. "Honey, what's for dinner?"

"BARRY, for the FIFTH FUCKIN' time, CHICKEN!!!"