Overheard in New York

I warn you now that this post and the link it points to is not politically correct. You have been warned.

My thanks to Mossy for showing me this gem of a website. Posted below are a couple of fine examples of things overheard in New York.

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Tip of the Day: A Virus is Not Bacteria

Hipster girl: Baby what's that smell? Is that your feet?
Hipster boy: What? I don't know, probably.
Hipster girl: Oh my god. The smell, I can't take it.
Hipster boy: It doesn't smell as bad as the old cooter did the other night when we were screwing. You didn't hear me say anything when you shoved my face into that crockpot of bacteria.

--F Train

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Scenes from the Free Concerts

Man: Of course you have to pick the row with the cripple. I can't get up now because I'll feel bad that she has to use her cane every time!
Woman: Frankly, I didn't even notice.
Man: Yeah, till you kicked her cane!

--Prospect Park Bandshell


Girl: Excuse me!...Would you guys keep it down? I am trying to listen to the band!
Guy: Oh, I am sorry...Would you mind crossing your legs? I am trying to enjoy the outdoors.

--Prospect Park Bandshell

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If You Pee Yourself on the Train, Al-Qaeda Has Won

Brit husband: I can't believe this isn't air conditioned.
Brit wife: Well, this isn't London...just pretend it is a sauna.
Brit husband: I can't. It smells like piss and sweat, not cedar.

--1 train

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He Acts Like He Doesn't Enjoy the Sex with the Men

Woman: Your brother's an actor? That's so nice.
Man: Yeah, he's really good. It's a great play.
Woman: What's the role?
Man: He plays this gay man who faces his own death.
Woman: Awww...
Man: But, I mean, he's no faggot or anything. My brother's just a really good actor.

--St. Mark's & 3rd Avenue

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Still More Insightful than Ann Coulter

Teenage girl #1: Yo I heard they have, like, a...circle, and they think it's art.
Teenage girl #2: Shit's retarded.

--in front of MoMA, W. 53rd Street


Overheard by: David Last

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Or What Some Call "Clinton Democrats"

Petition guy: Hi, are you a registered Democrat?
Dude: No, sex offender.

--20th & 1st